Oh No! It's the Ninkey Nonk.

"Oh No! It's the Ninkey Nonk" is a phrase (from Treehousetv.com, I think) that I find appealing. I wanted to shout it at the top of my voice this morning. You see, to me, the Ninkey Nonk isn't a train, it's a tactic whereby the truth is distorted to suit someone else's ego.

It's an understandable tactic, of course, and it can be quite useful in the short term. But it hits me hard. It makes me feel like I've been knocked to the floor. It winds me for an hour or two.

My sort of Ninkey Nonk requires at least 3 people: the Provider, the person trying to protect the subject's ego; the Object, the person being asked to confirm the Provider's untruth; and the Subject, the person who's ego is being protected.

Today, the Ninkey Nonk in question was being asked to confirm that it was quicker, overall, to drive 30 minutes in the wrong direction to catch a train for what was originally a 20 minute journey. This was because the driver, the subject of this particular Ninkey Nonk, is too timid to drive to unfamiliar places.

I'd rather the three of us all just admitted that, the timid thing. I'm not averse to timidity, in fact it's rather attractive in the right sort of person. But a timid person who pretends they aren't? No, I'm not in favour of the Ninkey Nonk being used to cover up that truth, however well meant.

The Ninkey Nonk is fine for young children, but it really isn't suitable for adults.